Healthy Transitions

Healthy Transitions by Marni Kent and Glenda Propst The transition period for a nanny commences at the very moment she gives her notice. Most nannies try to give a minimum of a 30 day notice as opposed to the traditional 2 week notice because of the nature of our jobs. This gives the parents time to find someone, bring them, and ideally, allow the old nanny to transition with the new nanny Sometimes when a nanny gives notice, the parents seem angry because the nanny is choosing to leave them. Often, what appears to be anger is really a feeling of rejection, frustration and despair because most parents rely on their nanny to help them balance the demands of their family life. It really does not matter how long a nanny has been with a family, or even how long she has been in the nanny profession. Any nanny who gives notice will have deal with the transition time which can be difficult to downright unbearable. When a nanny has been with a family long term, she might expect the parents reaction to be one of sadness, but many times the parents react by shutting the nanny out. They might be trying to send the nanny the message, you choose to leave us, so we will act like we don’t need you anyway. During your employment you might have heard things like: "We could not do it without you" "You are so wonderful!" "We hope you never leave". Now that you have given your notice, their words and actions may be saying "We don’t care" when deep down they are saying "What did we do to make you leave us?" .It’s going to be a long 30 days. Of course your first instinct is to walk out early, but as a professional you don’t want to do that to the children To overcome the difficulty of the situation, the nanny needs to reflect back to what is and always will be the most important aspect of any nanny position, the children. The nanny needs to remember that these last days with the children are important and that as hard as it might be at times, you have to take the high road. Saying goodbye to a family goes hand in hand with enhancing your career advancement opportunities. The end is just as important as the beginning. You will never regret taking the high road but taking the low road will always come back to haunt you. Someday you might hear through the nanny grapevine that the family has been through 4 nannies since you left. You might hear that they had to hire an extra nanny to do the work you used to do alone. Someday that family may come back to you and say "We are so sorry for the way it ended, we should have done it differently" So as you endure those last few days with those children you love so much, make a special effort to talk about your feelings, create some memories, and build your bridge.